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Approaching Women

Approaching women need not be awkward: a primer for your success with the ladies

Some men think that approaching women – particularly those they don’t know – is on their short list of scariest things to do. As a result, they simply bemoan their fate. They never even try. As a result, they cut themselves out of dozens of potentially gratifying experiences and new, exciting friendships. Really, fellows, the only thing holding you back from your goals is knowing a few tips on approaching women with that joie de vivre you already possess! Here, we’ve got some classy approaches to those classy women you’d love to get to know.

First, you’ve got to get past the idea that women are unapproachable. After all, they’re human beings, just like you. Wouldn’t you be delighted to have a friendly, nice looking woman approach you on the street, asking for directions to the nearest coffee shop, bookstore or whatever? Sure you would. Which becomes a case in point on the subject of approaching women.

With a city map in your hand, walk up to the woman who has caught your eye. With a polite “Excuse me, can you tell me where there’s a Starbucks(TM) close by?” Now, it doesn’t matter if you know the city inside and out and know perfectly well that that coffee shop is just around the corner. So what? The lady won’t take this approach as some cheap pick-up line. She’s likely to respond to your polite question in a friendly manner, wanting to be helpful. “Sure, there’s one just one block down and around your first right – you can’t miss it.” Now, you say, “Thanks – I appreciate your help … if you have a few minutes, would you like to join me for a latte? If you’re in a hurry, just let me buy you one for the road.” She may accept or decline, but remember, nothing ventured, nothing gained. In either case, you’ve learned one strategy in approaching women in a subtle and friendly gesture and a bit of interaction, no matter the outcome. Now that isn’t so hard, is it?

The corporate cafeteria is another venue for approaching women in a low-key manner. Go for breakfast or lunch at a time when the cafeteria isn’t crowded. There are sure to be open seats, as well as a few women. Go to a table with a free seat and a woman eating alone. Stop at her table and ask if she minds if you join her. She most likely won’t object. “Sure.” She may go back to reading the morning paper, but don’t let that put you off. Try breaking the ice with a remark on the recent earthquake in Haiti – this simple comment can be a conversation starter.

Just think about the many possibilities before you in everyday situations. The bus or metro stop. A line at the bank or grocery checkout. The music store, bookstore, or a party at a mutual friend’s. A walk in the park. For sure, not all your attempts at approaching women will be successful. The point is, with a little practice, you’ll soon overcome your fears and realize that some quite lovely women welcome you into their space, if only for a moment. Then again, you may find yourself with a dinner date and a phone number by the evening’s end. This scenario can well turn into more than a passing encounter. Once you overcome fears of rejection, you may find you’re quite the sought after guy!

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